Hello you wonderful people,

I hope you’re all well. Every time I complete one of these blogs I find myself thinking, wow! That’s a whole week that’s gone by and so much happens in that time, so much that I don’t actually include in this blog, I mean, If i told you everything then this would go on for a while, some of the things I leave out are little things, like the advertisement I saw on the underground for a watch that cost £795 but it was advertised in such a way that suggested £795 for a watch is a good price. Clearly I’m not part of the the target market! Or the ugly mannequin I saw in a shop window whilst travelling on a bus, this took me aback, because you know, most mannequins are pleasing on the eye, coming to think of it, most mannequins have white features, even in mostly black countries…in fact, I think that all mannequins have white features, has anyone ever seen a mannequin with black features? or Asian features? Do let me know…anyway, I digress. Other things I leave out are big things, like the fact that I forgot my friend’s birthday…Sorry Yolanda! Please forgive me. But regardless what I leave out, I hope you enjoy the read and someone please get back to me on the mannequins.

I can think of 795 cheaper ways to tell the time!

Who’s buying anything this mannequin is wearing?

Happy Belated Birthday Yogi! Note: I was very drunk when this picture was taken.

I started my week by making a list. Now of course this is not a new concept so I’m not fishing for praise but I can honestly say that whenever I’ve made a list of things I need to do then the next day has always been more productive, which begs the question, why don’t I make a list every night? I’ll let you know when I find a decent answer to that question.

A few things on my list included, washing clothes, cooking my food for the week, taking my suit to the dry cleaners and editing some video clips for social media. What did not make the list was spending most of the day watching ‘Top Boy’ on Netflix. If you don’t know what ‘Top Boy’ is, it’s a programme that originally aired on Channel 4 here in the UK. There were two seasons of this show and then it was off the air for a six years until Drake...yes Drake as in ‘Hotline Bling’ Drake, swooped in to revive the show and now it’s back, on Netflix and dare I say better than ever. I watched 7 of the 10 episodes that day and still managed to get everything on my list completed. I was rather impressed with myself. Who says men can’t multitask? I have quite a bit to say about ‘Top Boy’ but we’ll come back to that a little later.

I’m currently working on returning to vegetarianism. I say returning because, if you don’t know, I was raised as a vegetarian. This was back in the 80’s 90’s and 00’s before it was the kind of movement and big business that it is now. I was original in this thing…I knew about Tofu, Quorn and Linda McCartney Sausages before they were fashionable…what do you know about Sosmix???? (Inside joke for those that know) I was a strict vegetarian until around the age of 14 when I tried chicken for the first time at a friends house. It didn’t become a regular part of my diet and to be honest I didn’t like it that much but I did adopt seafood into my diet in my early 20’s. Since then I have tried it all, Chicken, Duck, Beef, Pork, Puffin, Whale, Kangaroo, Crocodile, Ostrich the list goes on, but now I feel like the time is right for change. So, first stop pescatarianism and then we’ll go from there. I think I’m destined to be a vegan at some point but rest assured I will not be a preachy vegetarian or vegan. If life has taught me anything it’s that people will always do whatever they want to do regardless of what you say. You can take a horse to water but you cannot make it drink, we all do things when we’re ready so each to their own. i wonder…how many more metaphors can I fit into this paragraph.

This week I started to realise just how hardened I have become as a result of living in London. It really hit me because I noticed the contrast between the Roman abroad and the Roman at home. Abroad I have more time for people, I feel more relaxed and more giving, but whilst here in London it feels as though I have a constant frown on my face when in public and I’m definitely not as generous or caring. It really hit me during my recent travels around the city, you see, I have to travel quite a lot for work and I have been using public transportation to do so for a while now. I also have to transport my fire gear around with me, which means carrying a rather large and heavy bag everywhere I go. The other day I was on the lower deck of a double decker bus and had my fire gear with me. I used the space for prams to rest my bag, since these days that’s the only space available, do you remember once upon a time when there used to be a space for bags at the front of the bus. Well, for some reason that space is gone and in it’s place is a box for the bloody Metro Newspaper. Anyway, so I’m resting my bag in the pram space and then two people get on with prams, instead of me thinking how tough it must be to be a parent and have to travel around with those children, I was just pissed off that I had to move my bag. Then when I finally got a seat, a bunch of pensioners got on. Instead of thinking how commendable it is that they’re still getting out and about and how hard it must be to get older with all the aches and pains, I was just pissed that I had to get up and vacate my seat. I thought about just how much of a dick I was for feeling this way, where was the compassion? The understanding? The care and consideration. I know it’s in there, somewhere, but I have to get through this hardened exterior that London has caused me to develop. With so much negativity coming at you constantly it feels harder and harder to care about things. Maybe this is why people have children, maybe having a child gives you something more to care about and a renewed purpose or maybe I just need a proper holiday, the holiday would most certainly be cheaper. I’ll be working tonight and that means more public transportation…pray for me.

My fire kit bag! The bane of my existence.

So, where am I meant to put my bag? Cha! Also, loving the snap shot of the mother outside on the street looking back at her daughter like “Hurry the f*#k up!!!!!

They say when it rains it pours and while there’s much for me to be positive about at the moment the sweet is also mixed with a bit of sour. You see me feeling good isn’t just about me, it’s also about the people around me. I want all the people around me to be feeling positive also, but some of those closet to me have been going through it and I’ve been doing my best to be there for them and lend an ear and a shoulder if needed. I know we’re all experiencing our own stresses but every now and then it could mean the world to someone if you take a bit of time to listen to what they’re going through. I had a bad habit of always wanting to fix things and offer solutions but sometimes it’s just about listening and allowing someone to get things out at you. This is important to remember.

Ok, now back to Top Boy, I have now finished all 10 episodes of season 3 and here are my thoughts. First and foremost I think the storyline and the acting was very good. I also found the characters to be very engrossing. What i liked about this show more than anything was the fact that, in my opinion, it did not glamorise road life, drug dealing, gang culture or anything else associated with criminality. It gave an accurate account of the negatives associated with such a lifestyle, the unnecessary loss of life and destruction of communities and families. What Top Boy also did very well was shine a light on the reasons why many young people get involved in road life and the disadvantageous circumstances they find themselves in that lead them down such a road. Issues such as deportation, gentrification and a lack of parental guidance were also highlighted over the 10 episodes. The writers, producers and directors of this show all did an amazing job in my opinion and the actors really brought it home. A great watch!

This week ended on a sombre note with the funeral for Ian. I attended the service along with a number of other guys from football. It was a truly emotional service made even more so with a recorded audio message from the man himself that was played for us during the service. Ian encouraged us to hold on to the things we care about and not let go of them, a beautiful parting message. I think that what scares us so much about death is just how final it is. Well, that’s definitely what scares me about it, there’s no, see you next week, or next year or maybe we can catch up tomorrow, it’s just over. One of Ian’s friends asked me how I’ve coped with loss and the only answer I could provide is that I don’t have an answer, because I’m yet to figure it out. I wish I knew of a successful way to deal with loss but I don’t, I guess everyone finds their own way, the one thing I know for sure is that it’s good to talk, so for anyone out there dealing with loss don’t keep your thoughts and feelings inside, find someone you can share them with.

As I come to the end of another blog I’d like to say a special thank you to everyone who’s been pre-ordering my upcoming single ‘Upon a Lifetime’ which will be released on 27.09.19 There’s still time to pre-order the track before it’s release date. You can do so via iTunes, Google Play and Amazon. I also can’t wait to share the music video with you too. I saw a first draft of it this week and was blown away! So make a note! This Friday is release day!

Finally, If you’d like to continue reading my blogs then please do subscribe to my mailing list below, as this is how you’ll be notified of future blogs and as always, thank you for reading. Have a great week.

Roman Harris

Find it, hold it, don't let it go By Roman Harris